Pissing Contest

I don't usually respond to these fanatics, but I just happened to poke my head back in to his blog and see his complete misrepresentation of everything that I said. It also bolsters my "libs as Kids" theory.

So without further ado:

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I’ve noticed that you keep poking your head into my blog either hoping for a response or some fodder. Well, here ya go, E. (how pretentious) David!

Way back in February, I posted a cute story about Ella voluntarily sharing her piece of cake with Chloe, and some neanderthal blogger named "Exile from Hilary's Village" felt the need to leave a very nasty comment calling me names and giving me parenting advice: "Be a man" and beat my two year old daughter because she's crying. He followed that up by pointing out, "I'm sure that your wife is thrilled with you. You're as much of a woman as she is. In trying to please women, you have become one." A month later, he was still so upset at my post, so horrified that a girl would share with her sister--doesn't she know, the Republican won the election, we live in an "ownership society" now and if you have nothing, no one is supposed to lift a finger to help you in any way?

I prefer to be called a ‘Neandertal-American’. Neanderthal is so 20th century.

The fact that you’re whining about somebody “calling me names” validates my entire theory that liberals are nothing more than children who have, emotionally, never grown up. Not to mention the fact that you also, later, call me a “bully”. Those are the two worst things that can happen to a kid, aren’t they? Being “called names” by a “bully”.

As far as giving you “parenting advice”, I never advised you to beat your daughter, and you know it. In fact, what I told you was, “(And) I'm sure that you assume that, being a Republican, I regularly beat my child. The fact is, I swatted her butt once and felt so bad about it that I could never do it again.” And that is a direct quote. You, sir, are a liar. I have the dated e-mail to prove it. But I expect no less from a liberal. Wasn’t it Marx who said, “The end justifies the means”? Which means that principles go out the window when you’re trying to achieve your objective. In this case, showing what a “Neanderthal” (sic) I am.

Yes, it did take me a month to get to your post but, being a single-daddy, I post when I have time. It just so happens that it took a month because, while interesting in a philosophical way, it wasn’t really all that important. It’s called “bookmarking” something so you can come back to it. I wasn’t upset about it, just amused that it made my point so well.

As far as the “ownership society” goes, it’s obvious that you think it’s wrong for able-bodied adults to take care of themselves instead of letting the government (i.e. mommy) take care of them. I wasn’t speaking of two-year-olds and, again, you know it.

You also seem to leave out the fact that I wasn’t exactly “horrified” by kids sharing with each other. In fact, it had nothing to do with your kids, in particular, at all. What I said was:

“I have no problem with people sharing within a family. In fact it was very nice of your daughter to do that. Being one of the intellectual left, I'm surprised that you missed my whole point. It wasn't that someone was sharing with someone else. It was the comparison between a small child whining, screaming and crying because they didn't get all that they wanted and the Left constantly doing the same thing.”

But, just like everyone on the Left, you can dish it out, but you sure can’t take it. Any perceived criticism is taken personally. I wasn’t commenting on your kids or your parenting skills. I was commenting on the fact that liberals are, emotionally, children. The fact that you continually fail to see that just proves my point.

I find it amazing (well, not really) that you and all of your liberal friends have managed to completely miss the point and blow this all out of proportion. If I would have found the post on the blog of a Conservative (unlikely), I would have come to the same conclusion. It’s about liberals acting like children. When they don’t have what they want, they expect other people to just give it to them.

as I say, he was still so angry over my post, that a month later he put up a post on his own blog continuing the attack on me, and also ridiculing my children and calling my wife names (because he's a member of the party that believes in "moral values" and traditional conservative lifestyles, where when you come upon someone you disagree with you froth at the mouth and scream angry epithets at them). In that post he said, "Just the fact that his kids are named Chloe & Ella tells me all I need to know about him." An anonymous commenter who came upon this post before I did asked him what my childrens' names told him. His answer: "the kid [is going to] have to spell [it] for people every time she's asked her name FOR THE REST OF HER LIFE." Because Ella and Chloe are such terribly complicated names, though not too complicated for Exile to spell, just for "a whole lot of people out there with public-school educations who won't be able to" (though, according to Exile, the real problem is that Democrats and academics look down at others. Heh).

Again, you give yourself way too much credit to think that I was “angry” over your post. It just summed up the two-year-old mindset of liberals wanting “more, more more!!!” so well that I found it amusing. Amusement and anger are very far apart on the emotional scale. In fact, what you libs always see as “hate-filled Republican thinking” is usually either amusement, bemusement or outright disgust with your thinking. That also speaks volumes about your mindset. You automatically go to “hate” when you disagree with us, so you assume that we feel the same. In your childish mindset, there are only opposites: love or hate, nothing in between. You only reserve shades of gray for good and evil.

And, yes, I do believe that it is cruel for parents to give these goofy Junior-high-school-girl-doodle names to their kids. Like I told you (and you neglected to mention), I was married to a woman who had to spell her name every time that she did anything. As I also told you, my name is pretty common but even I have to spell it for people.

Yes, Democrats (at least the liberal ones) do look down upon people in the same way that insecure children try to make themselves look like they know more than the rest of the class.

When I first saw his post, I ignored it for a couple of days. And then I got another of those anonymous troll comments. And the two of them together bothered me, more than they should have. I don't like conflict with people, really. I certainly want people to like me, more than I should. It's probably my great character flaw: I really, really want people to like and respect me. But you know this guy is simply an asshole who enjoys going around saying stupid offensive shit and then patting himself on the back for being so smart--the kind of guy who thought Dubya won that third debate "cause he said 'you can run but you can't hide,' huh-huh-huh-huh."

Wouldn’t “troll” be considered as “calling someone a name”? The hypocrisy is endless here. It’s OK for you to call people names, but you whine like a three-year-old when someone does it to you.

I’m sure that you don’t like conflict and I’m sure that you want people to like you. But my six-year-old-daughter has the same “character flaw”. She came home crying a couple of weeks ago because a little girl up the block said that she didn’t want to be her friend any more. Thank you for making my point.

You can call me an asshole if you like. I won’t even whine about you “calling me names”. What I say may be offensive to you, but it isn’t stupid. My IQ puts me in the 95th percentile of the population. I’m not patting myself on the back about it; while I am proud of it, it’s just a fact. But liberals and children always call people thay disagree with (what else?) “stupid”.

And your point that Dubya (that moniker really doesn’t offend us) may not have won the debate is kind of moot since he won the debate on November 2nd 2004, isn’t it? Wait, let me guess, you think he stole the election just like he did in 2000, right?

So after I got pissed off at the second troll, I went back to this Exile's blog and left him a comment. He responded, calling me some more names and pointing out that he's "at least as intelligent" as me, and claiming that, unlike me, he "live[s] in the real world every day" so he's better than me because I "never get out of the world of 'academia'." [sic]

Aww, I’m sowwy, which other names did I call you that time? Quotes would be nice.

The fact is, I am at least as intelligent as you are. That’s not bragging, that’s a fact. Just in case you think you’re dealing with one of those “knuckle-dragging, gap-toothed, mouth-breathing red-staters”.

And I stand by that statement completely. I do live in a world that you never see. Your wife’s a lawyer (I guess you consider that calling her names, and I do agree that “lawyer” is derogatory these days) and you’re enmeshed in the world of the University. When’s the last time that either of you have been on a factory floor? You know, talking to the “little guy” or, as Marx liked to call him, “the Worker”?

I never claimed to be “better” than you (your insecurity is showing), just that I live in a world that you think you’re trying to help, but of which you know nothing.

Seems that Exile has also been listening to way too much David Horowitz, and it got him into trouble, because he went off on this little diatribe about how much money I earn as a professor and announced, "I'd bet everything that I own that you make more money than I do." Well, there's a bet that I simply couldn't pass up, though because I am in fact a kind soul, even to benighted individuals like this guy, so I made a counter-offer in one of the three long comments I left on his post: "I'll respond to your email and tell you my salary. If it's less than you make, you can leave a comment here apologizing for assuming you know everything about me based on reading one post on my blog." I sent him my yearly salary in an email on Sunday afternoon. He's posted to his blog at least a few times since then, so I know he's seen my emails and my comments, but still no reply from him--no crowing post exulting because he was right and he earns less than I do (which, just from looking at his main page of posts, would certainly have been forthcoming if it had been the case), but also, imagine this, no apology. Despite all of his chest-puffing proclamations of his Real Manhood and his denunciations of me as a girly man, he refuses to "be a real man" and live up to his bets. He's not only a pretension (sic), small-minded bully but also a welcher.

Quite frankly, while I have heard of David Horowitz, I’m not very familiar with his work.

If your family makes more than 35K/year, you’re doing better than I am. The fact that your wife is a lawyer (again with the derogatory ad hominem attacks!) leads me to believe that you’re living better than I am.

Not all Republicans are rich. From my experience the vast majority of them aren’t. It’s just a Democrat stereotype. And here I thought that only Republicans stereotyped people.

I’m sure that you wished to portray me as some redneck, lowbrow idiot who could barely get his words to fit together in a proper sentence, but this will show anyone who wastes his time on your blog that I am perfectly capable of speech.

The fact is, you’ve lied and misrepresented many things on this post. If you care to dispute that, I really do have the dated posts to prove that you are a lying scumbag (ad hominem! ad hominem!). Go ahead and whine. Anyone who lies like you do deserves to be “outed”.

I’ll post this on my blog. Do you have the guts to do the same?

-The Exile